J Lo told Variety about what the 'Bear' star said to her in the wake of these old, ugly comments surfacing the same week they were scheduled to be on 'SNL' together -- and according to her, Ayo had tears in her eyes when she came to Jennifer's dressing room.

Ayo was apparently "mortified and very sweet" and said she felt "terrible" ... that's how Jen's characterizing it anyway. She says AE apologized for calling J Lo's career a scam, full-stop.

Remember ... Ayo was a guest on a podcast in 2020 -- long before she was a big TV star -- when she threw tons of shade at J Lo, particularly ripping her vocal skills in the booth.

The comments bubbled back up literally right before Ayo was set to host 'SNL' earlier this month, the same night Jenny was the musical guest ... when they'd be crossing paths.

Interestingly, Jen now says Ayo actually apologized after she did her soundcheck ... meaning Ayo had the chance to listen to J Lo performing live. Talk about irony, right?

Jennifer says Ayo told her, "I'm so f***ing sorry, it was so awful of me."

Following the dressing room apology, Ayo used a skit to issue a public mea culpa. She didn't mention J Lo by name but said, "It's wrong to leave mean comments or post mean comments just for clout, or run your mouth on a podcast and you don't consider the impact because you are 24, and stupid, but I think, I speak for everyone when I say that from now on, we're gonna be a lot more thoughtful about what we post online."

While it sounds like J Lo appreciated the apology, it seems like the whole situation was a bigger drag on Ayo ... J Lo explains that the mean comments didn't affect her because she's heard similar things said about her throughout her career.