TMZ Sports has learned ... the 38-year-old ex-Yankees stud and his actress wife, JoAnna Garcia, copped the super private Hidden Valley home recently ... and the "forest-like sanctuary" comes with everything you could ask for.

The 6,780-square-foot crib has 5 bedrooms and 7 baths, a media room, bar, library and office, gourmet chef's kitchen, master suite, walk-in closets and a dope pool/hot tub outside with a yard!!!

And, don't bother trying to visit Swisher's new palace unannounced -- the place has 24/7 guarded security. Yeah, dude ain't messing around.

Not only is the pad cool and private, it's also in a perfect location for hitting up all the Beverly Hills hot spots -- it's only about a 5-mile drive to Mastro's!!!

Final closing price -- $5.95 million (just a little bit of change for a guy who made over $94 million in his career).